Regardless of circumstances, inner peace is a choice. I will attest it is not an easy feat, yet when we come to know what unconditional love truly means, the practice is already within. Relationships become easier to navigate.
How often do you find yourself struggling with your negative mindset or pointing your finger at what others are being like or doing? I will just say, “stop”. Come to know yourself by being curious about you and being curious about them. Frankly, that will change every aspect of your life!
What have you come to know about peace of mind? Within the confines of circumstances, you truly can remain at peace when all feels like it is falling apart around you. Depending on your circumstances, be gentle with yourself as you develop personally and those with whom you are with. Standing firm with who you are gives way to an unconditional loving stance promoting being thankful within. Your tendency will be to love yourself and others right where they are, get curious, or simply notice.
Be aware of the narratives of your mind for these create your perspectives. In the simplest form of making this point, consider positive and negative narratives. Be curious about your thoughts creating a lens with which you are perceiving external experiences. All day long we are filtering our experiences and making choices sometimes at rapid speeds.
Take the time to slow things down and be aware of your tendencies in how you respond and consider a thoughtful response.
1. Notice your perspective
2. Be curious about the narratives of your mind
3. Decide what is true or what matters
The moment we start to revisit something that bothers us is the opportunity to seek our core truth. A time for reflection. Allow yourself to reflect. Consider your values and decide to keep your perspective or change your perspective. Sometimes all we need to do is simply let go of any ideas we have made up in our minds. There is so much freedom in that and it frees you up to continue your way with what truly matters.
Sounds so simple, right? Yet have you noticed how it takes practice to notice negative perspectives of ourselves or others, or get over someone’s reaction to you because of their own insecurity? So, be mindful of empathy and compassion for self and others. I am a firm believer now that happiness truly is an inside job.
Here's an example of an experience I had. I was reading an article written by a person claiming they are a Diversity and Inclusion Advisor. The first point they made was they consulted with their “preferred people” to discuss Diversity and Inclusion challenges. At first, I thought it was a joke to make their point. I couldn't help but laugh out loud feeling so perplexed.
My filter showed a red flag when I saw "preferred people". I could not believe what I was reading. I had so many thoughts rushing through my head that did not point to an inclusive or diverse group to talk with about these challenges. I was thinking they would want to consult with a range of people. Seems more diverse and inclusive to me and a way to gain a much broader perspective. In my mind there is no diversity and inclusion showing up here.
So, in this moment, I got curious about my perspective. I wanted to know how I could trust what I was about to read if this person had an exclusive group to meet with. Well, I took it a step further and asked them. I asked them how they have a preferred group yet call themself an advisor on the subject of diversity and inclusion. What I found out is that they do have a preferred group of people – they are studying the same topic.
See how easy it is to take on a perspective? And how curiosity and asking a question provides clarity? There is freedom when we acknowledge a feeling, we have choice! And a release when we take the time to decide what matters. What matters is when there is doubt, so find a way to discover your truth.
Notice today what your own filters are like. When you feel so right about something, is it true? And what about your truth now allows you freedom within? Will you take that freedom to express, or simply take note that all is well, and remain silent? How about being mindful of unconditional love? What do your actions show when you are thankful within?
Susan Husa, Animate Life Coaching. www.animatelifecoaching.com